Stop expecting superman!

Crazy as it sounds.. I am not the same person I was in August of last year.... The last time I wrote I was still stuck in the valley of pain. I feel like the windows are open again. I can see the light. I can decipher what is not seen. I can feel the light. One of the most influential people in my journey, Nikki, told me to read the book The Shack. My mom was worried it would be too much for me. It was just what my soul needed. It brought me back to center. It pulled me around that dark corner. It gave me peace and made me see the light once again. I was crazy angry at God... never knew I could be that angry and feel so abandoned. Growing up in a home where faith was your foundation, being angry at God was not acceptable. Well, there I was... pissed as hell. The few people I confided in said they would be, too. Problem was, I didn't want to be there! I wanted to lift that veil and feel the warmth again. I wanted to live in my euphoric world where God would make things better and take care of me. He wouldn't give me something I couldn't handle. I know I could never again enter that world but I have come to a happy medium. No, I don't think God is the author of evil things. Yes, I used to think he protected us from "bad".... Forgive my cynicism but that's a crock of shit. My God loves me enough to give his only son for my sinful ways. My God doesn't intervene in my life like I thought he did. He is not here to save us from pain. He is not here to heal us from sickness. He knows what is on the other side. That is where we are healed and protected. Here, we live with the consequences of the actions of man. They may have been actions centuries before us, but they are from man, not of God. My God doesn't punish us but let us live out the consequences of our actions and those that came before us. We do a great job of punishing ourselves. Now, along with reading The Shack, I have also started reading The China Study and doing research on eating alkaline. I am very interested on the role food and drink play on our bodies. I think it is profound to think that many of our maladies could be avoided if we ate fresh, clean food. There have been studies on this and the info is out there but it is just now slowly emerging as the cool thing. It is more and more obvious to me that we do not need animal fat in our diet. It blows my mind to see the intricate workings of our nations food industry including our schools and how they dictate what we consume. They dictate what we deem as healthy. Any other industry would say a study is flawed if the producer funded the study. Our food pyramid is a product of big business. The reason we feed our children milk and the reason we feel we must do this is because of marketing from the food industry. Osteoporosis is a funny thing. It runs in my family and I've always been told to drink milk and so forth. When you look at how your body works, you realize you can be causing the disease. If you have too much protein in your diet it will leach the calcium out of your bones...Milk is protein and you could very well make your situation worse...Anyway, I could go on and on.... especially about high protein diets and the risk you are placing on your body. So this goes back to my new realization that our lives could be a consequence of man's actions. If you don't take care of your body, the earth, your soul...you will see dis-ease....you will feel dis-ease....And somehow we expect God to come in and save us from ourselves when we don't learn from the past?!?! God ain't no superman....educate yourself and change or live with the consequences...